Hey, Guess What…

I’m back again! 

I know, I know, I have no consistency. I am terribly flippant and emotionally driven. I feel like I suddenly cocoon every few months and then emerge a stranger creature everytime. Like a shy little caterpillar that becomes a bold and brilliant butterfly, but then that butterfly cocoons again and emerges as a slightly less tolerant and slightly more aggressive version of the previous butterfly over and over again. Like a sad little teenager who thinks she’s edgy and punk when really she just has very bad stress management skills. Yup. That may be who I really am deep inside. I shant supress my true self any longer.

Anywho, I had a very pleasant experience today and I felt compelled to tell someone about it, and who better to tell of my personal life stories than a bunch of people on the internet whom I’ve never met before? Jolly good idea, I’d say. 

So, let me begin by telling you that I have had a stressful weak, and as I mentioned above I have bad stress management skills (I’m an INFP according to an online Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator, and supposedly they are notorious for having poor stress management). On Friday Januaury 27th a water main broke on my street, and so for a couple days we had no running water. They gave us a day of reprieve and turned the water back on, but still kept the drinking water advisory in effect, and then shut the water off again the next day. My shower opportunities were quite limited for the first half of this passed week, and that was quite irksome.   

Then on Tuesday I got a sinus infection which turned into a vicious head cold on Wednesday, and then on that very same day my period started. On top of all that, I couldn’t call in sick at work because the other two supervisors who normally would have been available to take a shift both happened to have personal matters which they had to taken time off for this past week. No hard feelings, of course. Far be it from me to fault someone for needing time in their personal lives. I need more than what many would consider my fair share. 

So, today has been the first day I could really lay back and rest for the whole day. The water is back on and the advisory is lifted, I have no social engagements I am required to take part in and because I am still sick my husband has been putting in an extra special effort to take care of me. However, once my husband left for work today, I couldn’t get back to sleep. This was a serious problem, because I didn’t get back home from work until 10:00 pm last night, and my husband’s alarm woke us up around 5:00 this morning because he started work at 6:15 today. 

So, I’m sick, I’m stressed, and I haven’t had a decent enough sleep to recover my health in days. What does my brain decide to do with this dilemma? Obsess over politics. Oh yes, my body was in desperate need of some good old REM sleep, so my brain decided that I should scroll through political memes on Twitter. So I did just that. I ended up spending the rest of the day watching Steven Crowder videos, Sargon of Akkad videos, Rebel Media videos (especially Gavin Mcinnes) and some Paul Joseph Watson videos. Yes, I know, many of them are insensitive assholes, but I love them.

All I have wanted to do all week was get a good, long, uninterrupted sleep, but noooooooooo. My brain has to think about stuff. Why must my brain always think about stuff? Half the time they’re not even good thoughts. They’re just half baked ideas about things that don’t even matter in the long run. Why? Why, oh why do I do this to myself? 

Then something wonderful happened. My husband came home around 4:00, and within a matter of minutes I began to feel sleepy. He made me a cup of hot chocolate, because even though he insists that tea would be better for me when I’m sick, I argued that I am more likely to take in large quanities of fluids if I drink hot chocolate because I drink it faster than tea. I won. He made me hot chocolate. However, by the time he brought the hot chocolate to me I was already nodding off. I forgot about the hot chocolate before I took a single sip, and fell asleep. 

This is one of the tremendous benefits of having a strong, masculine, and dare I say it… dominant husband. The moment he was in the home I felt safe. The moment he walked in the door I felt calm and peaceful. I have realized that I fall alseep significantly faster when I know he is near by, and I have no doubt that is because his pressence gives me a deep sense of security. 

So, once again I wish to give my thanks to all the strong men of God out there. To the men who understand the authority they walk in, and who understand that their strength must be tempered with patience and gentleness. A woman who is not battling against her own biology should recognize the value in your masculinity. I hope more women who wish to marry find men who will strive to keep them safe and won’t be ashamed of the implied gender roles therein. It really is a great blessing. 

Thank you for reading my blog. 

God bless you! 

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Sometimes Lyrics Annoy Me

Hello everyone! I’ve been trying to sit myself down and right another blog post for the past week, but my brain has been kind of all over the place. I keep having little thoughts that turn into whole blog posts in my head while I’m at work, but then when I get home I just take a bag of chips to bed and watch YouTube. Not only that, but I’m struggling to write 10 things I love about my dad, which I’ve been meaning to do for a while. Not because I don’t love him, but because he’s a great guy and I love him as a whole so much that it’s hard to break it all down into smaller points. 

Well, here’s a thought I had at work a few days ago that I continued to rant out loud about while walking home each day. 

Music affects me. It probably affects everybody. Lyrics can make or break a song to me, and sometimes I hear a lyric that bugs me so much that I’ll start singing my own lyrics in it’s place. Unfortunately because I work at chain store I have no choice but to hear music that annoys me if it comes on. 

A few days ago the song Big Girls Don’t Cry by Fergie came on. When this song was first on the radio I didn’t think much of it, but after having to hear it a kajillion times the lyrics started sticking out like a sore thumb. One lyric in particular really bugged me. 

“And I’m gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket.”

I know, it’s not a bad lyric. It’s maybe weird, but not bad. Well, I really don’t like it. I’ve come to believe that the biggest blow you can give to the average woman’s ego is to make her believe she is not wanted, and the biggest blow you can give to the average man’s ego is to make him believe he is not needed. What does this lyric say? It compares the emotional attatchment to the (probably male romantic partner) subject of the song to the emotional attachment of a child to an old blanket. Wanted, but no longer needed. To most women this is probably fine. Not ideal but still okay, because being wanted even when we’re still not needed is almost comforting, even if the comfort is a bit bitter. What if this could be devestating to a man? Yeah, sure, he’s still wanted, but now he has about as much practical use and purpose as an old children’s blanket. 

It’s a small thing, just some pop song, but it has been making me think lately. 

Well, those have been my thoughts. Thank you for reading! God bless!!

Of Biological Inclinations and Rotten Produce

Hey guys… I’ve been thinking some unconventional thoughts today… Some reeeeaaaaally out of the box thoughts. Like reeeeaaaaally out there in the far reaches of space where political correctness hasn’t been seen or heard of for a few billion light years. 

So, about a week ago I saw a post on Facebook which talks about a status update someone made. In the status update it is relayed that a woman and a man sat down to watch some TV together at the woman’s house after a date. Suddenly the woman’s dog jumped up on the man’s lap and the man pushed the dog off quite violently and snarled “I hate dogs!” The woman got up and told the man to leave. In this post it is revealed that the comments on the status update don’t side much with the woman, but actually assert that the woman should have warned the man about the dog. 

Then the person writing this post tells us that they made another status update that relayed the same story, but had the genders reversed. It is then revealed that most of the comments of that post once again do not side with the woman. Instead of saying, “He should have warned her about the dog,” they heavily chastise her. 

At the end of the post this person writes, “And this is reason (insert larger number here) that we still need feminism.”

So, my sudden thought today was that maybe, maaaybeee, juuuust maaaaaybeeee the difference in the responses from the commenters to each story was just a little tiny bit kind of almost perhaps in a sense sort of maybe justified? Even just a smidgen?

OKAY OKAY OKAY DON’T THROW YOUR ROTTEN PRODUCE AT ME JUST YET!!! Just let me explain myself first. 

We all think that it’s awful to hear of an adult harming a child, right? It’s always detestable to the masses. However, isn’t there usually a particular disqust that is felt and expressed when a child is harmed by his or her own parents? Sure, we don’t ever want to see an adult harming a child, but isn’t there something distinctly revolting when it’s a parent harming his or her own child. 

Why might this be? Well, I think it’s because there is an expectation for parents to be strongly biologically inclined to do what is right and beneficial for their own children no matter what. Anyone harming a child shows a lack of natural affection, but a parent harming his or her own child shows an exceptional lack of natural affection. And might I suggest that women are supposed to have a strong biological inclinations to be nurturing toward smaller, dependant creatures? And that men are not supposed to have as strong of a biological inclination to be nurturing toward smaller, dependant creatures? 

I once watched a documentary on YouTube called The Tiniest Girl in The World, which is about a girl whose growth was severely stunted. Her body from a purely objective point of view looks strange. In the comments it seemed that most of the women were praising her for being cute or beautiful, while it seemed that most of the men were saying that she just looked creepy. 

It seems to me that women are more likely to distinguish whom they will nurture and give affection to by how much someone or something resembles young offspring, and men are not. Men seem more likely to make such distinguishments based simply upon who lives in there household and who does not live in their household. Whom they are personally responsible for and whom they are not personally responsible for. 

And perhaps that is a good thing. Maybe it is good that the gender which has what is physically nessecary to bear and nurture infants would have a mind more suited to nurturing. Maybe it is good that the gender which would then be needed to protect and provide for the mother and child during times of very involved nurturing would have a mind more suited to protection. Not being overburdened by those whom he is not personally responsible for, so not to be distracted from the mother and child. Always being prepared that a threat could come, maybe in the form of an animal or a suspicious human. Perhaps this sounds primal, but I believe the primal stuff never really left us, and never really will. Maybe these are biological inclinations having nothing to do with social constructs, and therefore cannot be changed by trying to tear down social constructs. 

So, while it may show a lack of natural affection for a man to not instinctually want to nurture smaller dependant creatures, perhaps it shows an exceptional lack of natural affection for a woman to not instinctually want to nurture smaller, dependant creatures. 

Boy, I really went off on a tangent there. Okay, you can throw your rotten produce at me now.